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Love Doesn't Live Here Anymore


One of the biggest mistakes I ever made in my life, was staying in a relationship, that I knew had no real future or one that wasn't good for me. This particular relationship I was in lasted over 8 years, she didn't want to marry me and I sure didn't want to marry her either.We were just together because we got alone well, the food was okay(I did most of the cooking) and maybe because the sex was good , but now that I have had time to reflect it wasn't all that. We didn't see eye to eye on anything and the only thing we had in common was that we both attended the same church on Sundays. We both had outside children from previous relationships, that loved us both very much, but even they noticed that we were not meant to be together. I remember one of her little girls walking up to me and saying Mr. Charles my mother doesn't like you. I then asked her why and then she said, because every time we are out in the mall she always looks at other men. I knew then that I didn't want or love her, not because I was jealous of her mother looking at other men, it was because I didn't care if she did. Its a shame to be with someone not caring, what they do or even care who they are with, but for over 8 years that's how our relationship went. The reason why I stayed in the relationship was because I was comfortable, loved her children, we didn't argue, it was easy and I was afraid of starting over. Maybe I thought if we stayed together a little longer that I would one day grow to love her.(I was only fooling myself) Deep down inside, I always knew that we weren't meant to be with each other and one day it would come to an end.

 After we broke up I vowed never to live in a loveless relationship again, because when you do you only waste valuable time and  I could have missed out on the woman that I was meant to be with. I learned that a man or a woman can have many lovers, girlfriends or boyfriends, but when it comes to love or marriage you can only have one true love or spouse for life. Why waste it on someone just because of the children, financial reasons or because you may be afraid of starting over.Someone once asked me," Chuck how does one know when to give up or when your marriage or relationship is over?" I looked at them , then said when you or both you, don't care anymore.

 As you think about what I just wrote imagine a world or life where you are either in a marriage or relationship that you are very miserable or unhappy with and you hate going home to them. The man or woman you are laying next to or spending time with, well to put it plainly you have unhealthy or no feelings  at all. What ever love or affection you felt for them in the beginning , is gone or  has faded away. Now you are miserable, unhappy, stressed out and now you wish that you could have avoided them in your past. That way you wouldn't be in this miserable situation. If you happen to be reading this, please take my advice, find someone you can not only like, but also someone you can fall in love with and build something that may last a lifetime. Make sure that you attracted to them not only for who they are, but for also how they make you feel. Because if there is no love or passion in the marriage or relationship then its only a matter of time before it ends and most of the time when it does its real messy or it may end ugly. My advice is very simple, if there is no real connection between you and your lover, don't wait to end it. The sooner its done the better, it will be for the both of you. Because its pretty obvious that, Love Doesn't Live Here Anymore. Write in then express your thoughts or opinions on the subject.
Chuck


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