Finish What You Started

As a writer I have found that if you are going to put something on paper or on the Internet that it takes a lot of thought. When I began this journey as a writer, I have been doing my best to address some subjects that weren't addressed by many writers, doctors or touch some that weren't addressed on some talk shows. Today's subject is about infidelity or why some people cheat. Many people when they hear of someone having an affair or when someone cheats they tend to play the blame game. Women blaming men or men blaming women. As always when it happens most feel like its not their fault when their spouse or mates cheats or gets caught in an affair. What I am going to do today is to attempt prove my last sentence false. Now I am not saying what you are about to read is fact for all situations, because there are just some men or women that will cheat no matter what their spouse does. But for the majority of those who cheat or have an affair I have found a reason, even though not justified, a clear reason why some have cheated, had an affair or for those who are thinking about doing so at this moment.

Why do most people cheat, have an affair or have thoughts of being unfaithful? Because most men or women after they get married don't finish what they started. What do I mean by this? Most men or women begin their relationships, built on lies or they may do what ever it takes to get the man or women they want. Men and women have been guilty of overly romancing their spouses. Men have been known to be very nice, very romantic, sending flowers, sending romantic text or e-mails, spending money lavishly and some even have the nerve to go to church with their spouse just to impress the woman they are interested in. Pretending to be the perfect man, man of God or the man of their dreams. The problem with this, is that once they get married they stop doing whatever it was to get their woman. Also some men have been known, to get out of shape, then become fat and lazy, this within itself can become a major problem. This can also be true for a lot of women and after time some women do the same thing. Some stop being sweet, others stop cooking and many men all of the world have complained that very soon after marriage their wives stopped having sex with them. One man and I quote said," Its like she just turned the faucet off and just stopped". One moment she was making love to me six days a week, being that freak I fell in love with, three times a day and after we got married it turned to once a month or I had to make an appointment just to have a few minutes or hour to be intimate. Some may laugh at this last statement, but after reading it for myself it reminds me of few statements my late grandmother would say. Don't start something that you can't finish or don't write a check that you can't cash. But better yet, Finish What You Started. In other words if you don't have any intentions on being a good man or woman all through the relationship or marriage then don't get involved in one in the first place. But if you start your relationship or marriage off good, great or wonderful then keep it up and for the sake of your marriage or relationship don't change. If you do change then you are not the man or woman that they fell in love with and that can cause them to look some where else or to cheat. Don't have your man or woman missing the person they fell in love with, instead  Finish What You Started. And if you do then you could have a very successful marriage or relationship that will last for a lifetime. Write in , then express your thoughts or views on the subject.


Anonymous said…
Infidelity, if you haven't done it, you'll never understand it. There are so msny answers to the question, why people cheat. I can't fantom how one can be intimate with someone without having loving feelings towards them. Once I asked a man who was very promiscuous, by his own admission, why did he cheat, he said it had nothing to do with the woman he was with, he really loved her but just wanted something different once in awhile. I said what!, what's the difference. He said there are somethings it want that he would not ask his wife/woman to do sometings because he respected her, he didn't have any respect for the wommen in the street. He'll go get what he wanted and then go back to the one he loved. I was dumbfounded. I'll never understand lust but I would assume it takes a hold of you like an addiction that you can't control yourself. I'm one who has experienced being cheated, which was not a good feeling, but realized that it was nothing I did. Years lster my ex husband explained to me why he cheated and that it had nothing todo with me. I forgave him but knew in my heart I couldn't be ina relationship with him again. Just couldn't go back. huck, I do agree with you that you hsve to continue doing the same sweet things you do in courtship and bring it into marriage. Many people only know how to love or show love to a certain level and then they get lost in the relationship and that mostly stems from their up binging, their role models and the level iove they have received in their lives. Lynette
princes griffin said…
all I can say is, you should have posted this 13 years ago for my ex to read. not to say we would still be a couple now. thanks, you touch a very good topic.

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